How come it never rains...

So on Sunday I finally started to feel really positive about things for the first time in months. Back at work and earning again for a few weeks. Continuing to make a good recovery from breaking my wrist in a motorcycle accident and now almost back to normal. Playing the guitar again and finally getting back to full reach in the fingers and nearly full flexibility in my wrist. I'd even managed to get to a couple of 'proper' gigs in December. I won't be back on two wheels for a while, but for financial reasons rather than any fears of getting back on a bike - I'd get back on one tomorrow if I had one available. However, it's the middle of winter and even if I won the lottery I wouldn't think about buying another bike before spring - I don't like being cold and/or wet - or getting my machine covered with all that salt shit they cover the roads with at this time of year that makes it go rusty and corrodes the aluminium. Besides, freezing myself on a bike isn't going to help me recover from my recent injuries. At least I still have the car....

My life seemed to be on a downward spiral since the motorcycle crash in September with the loss of my bike along with five gigs I had to pull out of - four as a bass player in someone else's band, and one with my own band which was particularly important to me. But finally things seemed to bottom out and I began to pull out of my dive. At last I was starting to feel positive about things again.  I could see the light at the end of the tunnel - and it wasn't an oncoming train. Or was it?

So feeling much better about things I drove off to work on Monday morning. I'd only gone a couple of miles when as I negotiated a tight corner I saw a Range Rover apparently cutting the corner off and crossing over to my side of the road. BANG! We collided head-on. Fortunately neither of us was going very fast and there were no injuries to either party. We pulled off the road to exchange details. She said sorry and admitted it was her fault - without any prompting from me. She blamed her door mirror for obstructing her view, but I suspect she wasn't looking where she was going or wasn't paying attention for some reason - on the phone? It was still dark, and it was raining but the road was lit and visibility wasn't bad. I didn't notice much damage to her motor, but the high Range Rover bumper had gone right over my bumper and dented and distorted the bonnet, as well as knocking out one of my indicator lights.. Well at least her insurance would be paying for it all. She said I'd get a phone call later today or tonight after she'd spoken to her husband.....

I heard no more so I phoned my insurance company to find out what was going on. They informed me that she was now blaming me for the accident and claiming that she had stopped and I had crashed into her - virtually the opposite of what had actually happened! After admitting responsibility at the scene she had now completely changed her story! I can only assume that her husband (probably the owner of the vehicle) had talked her into changing her story and blaming me instead. It get's worse. My insurance company arranged to have the damage to my car inspected. It was declared a write-off straight away due to the age of the vehicle. In my opinion it wasn't too badly damaged and wouldn't have been that difficult to fix - but they decided it would cost too much to put right. To be fair, parts for a 20 year old car might have been difficult to obtain - especially if it needed a new bonnet - and the labour costs would have been high. They only valued my car as worth £450 - a fraction of what I originally paid for it when it was fairly new. I couldn't really complain too much being offered that for a 20 year old car that was visibly past it's best, although I was hoping it still had a few more years life left in it. However, my insurance policy has a £400 excess! So if they wrote the car off and the other party's insurance didn't cough up I'd only get £50 for having my car written-off even though it wasn't my fault! And of course I'd lose my 20 year's worth of no-claim bonus and have to pay a lot more for car insurance in future! There were no witnesses to the accident, or none that stopped anyway - so it's my word again's her's. I told my insurance company there was no way I was accepting any of the blame as it was completely her fault, but they said it would probably end up settled as being duel-fault or split-blame or something. So she will end up fucking me over big time and I will lose my car and get paid next to nothing for it even though the accident was totally her fault. And I have no money to buy another car. Even if I got paid the full £450 'value' for my car - what could I buy with that these days? Looks like I'm totally screwed. I think I'll be having to get the train to work for the foreseeable future...

The following day I was hoping to go to a gig down Holloway Road - some good bands and plenty of my friends there, but I'd been getting some aches in my side and back during the day possibly as a result of the accident - so I didn't go in the end as I didn't fancy travelling far on public transport and possibly ending up feeling pretty rough on a night out.

"How come it never rains?

It only pours....

...Well into the bright lights,

The rain in the gutter's still the same"

Tyla - Dogs D'Amour

One week later. My car is taken away for scrap - 15 years almost to the day since I got it. I could have cried. I don't think I've had any other car longer than four years or so. Another link with my past gone. So many memories - times out going to places with my dad. So many places I went in that car, I drove it nearly a hundred thousand miles - and it never broke down or failed to start. Not even once. On Sunday I drove it knowing it was for the last time ever - it felt very miserable. I got home and took all my bits and pieces out of it - quite a lot of stuff. On Monday morning I took one last forlorn look at it as I headed off to work - knowing it would be gone when I got home. I could have cried, but I think I've forgotten how....

Back on my downward spiral I go. Within the space of a few months I've broken my wrist, been off work for a long period and lost a lot of money, lost my bike, and now my car. I feel like I've lost part of my identity. I feel one part of my life may be drawing to a close, and I'm not sure what the future holds.